Thanksgiving!

Here's a quick and dirty post about my super awesome, luxuriously long, Thanksgiving weekend.

It started with a verrry verrry long drive- about 2 hours longer than usual because of damn holiday traffic.
But surprisingly, Sean and I didn't kill eachother on the trek to his family's cabin spot on Devils Lake (near Lincoln City, Ore.)
We actually had fun!
But I didn't take any pictures of that.
We got to the cabin late - about 11:30 p.m. the night before Tofurkey Day.

But, this is what we got to wake up to:

 Let me just say Sean's mom knows how to party ;) 

Here are the guys of the cabin, having a pre-dinner toast. From left to right - Sean's stepdad Jerry, Uncle Mark a.k.a. 'the lowrider,' cousin-in-law Jason, and Sean. 


Here's the rest of the gang, excluding Aunt Donna (taking picture) and little brother Avery (napping.)
The girls are cousin Emma (center), me, and Sean's mom Christine (the one who knows how to partay!)



The food was amazing! I got to make my very first Tofurkey Roast, and whipped up my signature gravy (which everyone loved, as always. Not trying to brag, just saying).

Sean made some tasty yam and apple dish, as well as a hippie-infused focaccia bread (I naively bought the "healthy" unbleached whole wheat flour over our usual all-purpose flour for this recipe not realizing it would drastically change the usual fluffy texture Sean takes so much pride in. But it was still pretty good.)

I will say I am a proud member of the completely clean plate club, which I actually photographed, but later decided not to post because I think you all know what a clean plate looks like.

 Sean's cousin Emma and her husband Jason. It was so fun getting to know these guys over the weekend! We had a blast. 

Buffy and I in our matching red hoodies...  at the ocean, btw.

     More shots of the ocean at the very nearby Road's End state park. Our cabin was actually on the  lake, but we were so close to the Pacific you could actually hear the ocean from the deck!

  Sean, Christine and Avery.

After spending the morning at the ocean and briefly touring Lincoln City, Sean and I headed back home, where we were greeted with yet another Thanksgiving!
Since my mom always works Thursdays (aka always works Thanksgiving) and my sister was unhappy with her leftover ratio, she suggested we have another dinner Sunday night in honor of Thanksgiving as well as my upcoming birthday! (Which means I got to invite friends!!!)

I didn't take as many pictures this time around, but we had another amazing meal (where everyone loved the vegan stuff, yet again), and a super fun time laughing with literally (most of) my favorite people in the world.

My sister Rachel and her husband Chris, the fucking cook.
(Not sure if he actually cooked anything but whatevs).

Three of my best girls: Kat, Court and Tay. 

Also in attendance, but not pictured, Janis, Jim, Justin, Julian, Grace and Camden. 

Yipeee! 

Naked Sunday!

After a brief, one-week hiatus from posting naked photos to the blogosphere, I'm back with a few to share from last night's incredible Swampy Draws performance at the world-famous Swiss Pub!

 Friends, family, fans.

 The man, the myth, the legend: Swampy Draws himself!

 The view from the deck.

Shake it!

Shake it like the devil!

Naked on a Boat!

This weekend was the first true taste of summer for us PNW-ers, so Sean and I made it our mission to get out on a boat.
And with just a little convincing, Papa Rob graciously let us ride out to Delano Bay with him, which is an amazing shallow/warm/calm water spot on the other side of Penrose Point.
I can't believe I had never been there before.

Needless to say, we had a blast! It was sooo nice to finally get our summer on.

 

 

 

Thanks, Grace!

So I'm generally a pretty happy, easygoing person. 

Don't get me wrong,  I get straight heated when the time is right, but I usually don't just walk around thinking that the world sucks.

But for whatever reason, today I was totally not in a happy mood. 

I woke up normal, and moderately happy.

Then work happend. 

Rain in July.

Got about three disappointing text messages.

And voila! I'm grumpy.

And I really don't like being grumpy.

Being grumpy actually makes me more grumpy because I fixate on how annoyed I am that I'm grumpy, which obviously fuels the fire. 

It's a pretty vicious cycle, really.

So, in order to distract myself, I decided to read my sister's blog , which didn't actually help matters because he content of her latest post is midly depressing and, she has the flu. 

BUMMER.

So naturally, I moved on to my neice Grace's blog, where she had recently shared a few simple things that make her smile.

Not only does Grace alone always make me smile, but so does thinking about the little things that make her smile. 

So, in an attempt to be less bitchy and more smiley, I'm taking a cue from the noble 12-year-old in my life and going to focus on the many, many things that make me happy, instead of the handful of things that don't.

Here goes!

(And these are in no particular order)

First off, Grace 

and her blog

because pretty much everything that she posts makes me smile in some way- whether it be her hilarious, witty or observant rambings, or her always sunny, bright and cheery photos (usually of people that I know and love, which obvi adds to the smile-factor.)

P.S. isn't she freakin' gorg?!

2nd:

Yesterday I picked up my oldest friend Courtnay from the airport. 

I hadn't seen her since April, and she hadn't set foot on the West Coast since January. 

Not only am I super excited to be able to hang with her for the next few days (which includes a whitewater rafting trip in Wenatchee.... whaattt?), the pick-up itself was hilarious and definitely makes me smile!

(Brief recap: we told Court that Taylor had to work so she wouldn't be able to come with me to pick her up. But we lied. Taylor hid in my trunk, and when Court opened the hatch door it was hilarious!)

THREE

My boyfriend's latest Facebook post. (Cheesy, I know.)

But without him even knowing my day wasn't exactly up to par, he sent me a Facebook note saying "Hope yer days goin well shoooga!"

(please ignore the grammatical errors. he sent it from his phone.)

And he's not exactly the Facebook-wall-posting type.

Simply stated, made me smile. 

(Among the many other sweet and hilarious things he entertains me with on the daily.)

four

my dog.

Literally all I have to do is think about his wacky ass, and I'm usually beaming from ear-to-ear, if not completely in stiches. 

Much love.

 Five:

My family, in general.

Not only do I have an intense love for all of my crazy relatives, it makes me smile that I get to see most of them on a pretty regular basis.
From my awesome sister, whom I don't know what  I would do without;

to my sweet and unknowlingly hilarious mom; my goofy, but loving, brother; my even goofier, and equally as loving dad; three impressively adorable/handsome/funny/smart/talented nephews; myriads of unique and enviably talented cousins, aunts and uncles; three out of four grandparents, not to mention all the non-blood-related family members that I hold extremely close - you name it, I got it! 

And I know a lot of people don't. 

Which means I should buck up and smile about it, dammit!

Six:

Nice weather.

Even though we are not experiencing that at the exact moment (see fig. 1 below) when it does pop up (like fig. 1 says it might tomorrow) I know I'll be smiling about it then...

fig. 1

7!

The peanut butter pretzels and chocolate chips I packed for a snack, which I will soon be eating.

AND the hot, homemade soup I am eating currently (I know it's July, but remember, it's RAINING? soup makes sense. and makes smiles).

eight:

the sweet new paint job I gave my bike this weekend

(before)

(after)

nine:

This joke (which I have unofficially dubbed as my 'favorite joke of all time')

What's brown and rhymes with snoop?

scroll to the bottom of this post for the punchline.

10.

It's Thursday, which only means one thing: tomorrow is Friday! 

Which mean's I can bring out the Rebecca Black. 

Saturday comes after that, and then... it's Sunday... and I got no complaints on weekends, people.

So bring it on, pissy mood!

My "things that make me smile list" will totally defeat your sorry ass!

and here's the punchline to number nine:

Doctor Dre, motha effas!

(I know you all wanted to say poop. Don't lie.)

Naked at the Beach!

Shots from a beautiful Sunday at the ocean in Longbeach, Washington.

(Yes, summer has finally arrived in Washington.)

Enjoy!

 Longbeach POWER!

The apple of his eye?

 Father and Son. 

Aka Brother Lars and Nephew Nicholas.

 Bloody Sunday.

 Axe family portrait. 

 Axe family portrait + Sean...

Shotgun for Pete's Sake. We miss you, brother!

(this photo taken by the illustrious Jaedin.)

linking up with Grace Love's The Beatles Beach/Water photo share.

Feliz Dio De Los Padres!

(a.k.a. Happy Naked Father's Day. Trust me, it's not as gross as it sounds.)

 Prep for "Andreas Vegan Day" barbecue. 

Explanation for the above barbecue title:

I am vegan. 

My Dad's name is Rob.
His middle name is Andreas (he has been going by Andreas as of late).

Now that I'm vegan, he is adding "Vegan" to his new "name" because it "sounds good."

(For the record, Andreas' idea of veganism is "not eating anything that has been touched by a human cow.")

But I digress...

Anywhoo - loved that we had so many fresh, local veggies incorporated into the Father's Day grill .

...and moving on...

 Two of my best girls, Alecia "Leech" Campbell and Katherine "Kathy-Cadaver" Murts.

 Sistah Rachel and Uncle Chicker. (Andreas Vegan's older bro.)

 Token awesome niece-and-nephew-shot (Grace and Charlie).

 Camden playing bass for the first time ever.

He did really well and has a scary-striking resemblance to his Uncle Pete.

And please, disregard that this is possibly the most inappropriately-stickered-instrument for a 7-year-old. 

(For the record, he was too excited to play the bass than to actually read it.)

Back-flips in the front yard with Sean Kemp and Jesus.

And last, but most certainly not least, Robert "Andreas Vegan" Jensen. 

The mack-daddy of the entire event.

Love you  Dad!

And Feliz Dio De Los Padres, to you all!

Naked Sundays, round 12:

Today was a good day...

Fact: sister is an avid photographer/semi-famous blogger

Fact: she likes to shop for new toys

Fact: first two facts combined mean she was hip to buying a fancy, new, top-of-the-line Nikon D5100 (it takes video, has a flip out screen for selfies and a 2500-noiseless ISO people! I'd buy one too, if I had a sugar daddy...)

Fact: She ultimately had no use for her "old" camera

Fact: I'm less hip to making independent tech upgrades

Unavoidable outcome:

I bought my sister's old camera. Which is about three years newer than my 2007 model, higher mega pixels and came with a brand new freakin' lens. 

Yep. 

You could say I'm a pretty happy lady (see fig. 1).

Especially since I was even able to sell my old camera, so buying my sister's didn't even break the bank too much.

I'm also happy because my new camera called for a new handmade strap (see fig. 2) and allowed me to take an adorable picture of two of my favorite females (see fig. 3).

It's only a coincidence that those two females happen to be my semi-famous blogging, toy-upgrading, camera-selling, camera-strap-making sister and her semi-famous blogging, extremely talented and adorable daughter (aka my favorite niece). 

fig. 1

fig. 2

fig. 3 

For the record, Grace is not actually taller than Rachel. As you can clearly see, Rachel is sitting down, hiding her true, impressive height.

And on top of all that, I got to enjoy a totally delicious and fully-satisfying vegan meal with my family tonight at my big bro's birthday party. 

Granted, I was the only one who enjoyed the vegan items, but it was quite the step-up from last week's family dinner where my mom told me that she made the "special trip to get fish" to accommodate my vegan diet. 

Tonight, she offered to leave the butter out of the chicken-broth-infused Stove Top dressing,
Seriously, so sweet of her to try!

Anyways, check these beauties out:

Stuffed baby 'bellas with a mixture of about 1/4 cup vegan cream cheese, 1/8 cup vegan Blue Cheese, 1/2 cup finely chopped spinach, removed mushroom stems diced, green onions, minced garlic, salt n' pepa and some fresh thyme (bake for about 10 mins at 400 then broil for a few to crisp 'em up just right).

Add to that dog snuggling and more red wine drinking, and you could safely quote  Ice Cube when reffering to my feelings about the day.
I didn't even have to use my AK.

(explicit lyrics disclaimer) 

Naked Sundays - Round 6

This weekend I had the pleasure of babysitting 3/4 of my nieces and nephews (aka my sister's kids).

I spent Friday night and Saturday with 11-year-old Grace, 7-year-old Camden and 15-month-old Charlie.

We watched a lot of TV (sue me, it was raining) and the kids ate a lot of mac n cheese. 

In Charlie's case, the "eating" of the mac really consisted of "getting everywhere" especially on Friday night when he rubbed it all over his head (giving him an awesome 'do, I might add).

Here he is eating on Saturday. No mac-n-cheese 'do, but you get the point.

And this is a very rare shot of C.P.'s mac-n-cheese eating style... he is using a fork rather than his hand as a shoveling device.

Yum! 

And so cute! 

I actually think this expression (which was caused by distraction from the TV) is a strong resemblance to Charlie Pete's namesake, his Uncle Pete, which I love.

VEGAN?!?!

So after years of not eating meat (except for fish) due to my strong beliefs in animal rights, I have finally taken the plunge into veganism.

I have never been one to preach my beliefs on others, or even delve into my reasoning for not eating meat (unless specifically asked to do so) because for me, it has always been a personal choice.

I am not necessarily trying to save the world, but I cannot stomach  the factory farming industry (pun wasn't initially intended, but yay for puns!)

I will, however, briefly touch on my philosophy here, to explain my current move into veganism.

I have always known the mistreatment of animals didn't stop at the slaughterhouse, it is just as bad for factory-farmed dairy cows and egg-laying hens.

However, I never felt I was able to "give up" one of my favorite foods: cheese.

Until recently, the idea of going full-fledged vegetarian had entered my mind... but then there was that little voice that said "but you can't live without cheeese!"

And over the past few months, that voice started growing smaller and smaller, until I realized I was ready to jump into a diet-lifestyle that fully reflected my strong disdain for large industry, factory farming practices.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Anywhoo - a change to a vegan diet isn't all that crazy drastic for me, having already cut meat out of my diet (and a good portion of non-cheese dairy) for quite some time.

But in the last month of transition (and close to three weeks of full-fledged non-dairy eating) I have definitely had to adjust.

Asking restaurants to leave the cheese, sour cream, butter etc... off of my veg-centered meals is no biggie. 

Cooking at home even more do-able.

But milk and eggs can sneak their way into even the most unsuspecting of items, which causes me to think twice and read the ingredients much more often than before.

And then there's the people that you "break the news to."

My two carnivorous, food-loving best friends literally cringed when I told them about my decision while on vacation in Charleston.

(They've since warmed up to the idea. One of them going as far as to say "I'm so glad you're a vegan who still eats!!!)

At my "last hurrah" fancy-pants-ed "cheese eating" party for my Aunt's 50th birthday earlier this month (literally like 20 varieties of delicious, gourmet cheeses... it was pretty good timing in my mind) much of my family - several former vegetarians - had a similar reaction.

"But whyyy?!" they wanted to know.

My boyfriend simply said "YOU not eat CHEESE?" and laughed at the idea when I first told him (that's how much I love cheese). 

He has since been very supportive, checking ingredients and eating vegan right along with me.

My brother didn't think twice at the idea, and even seemed to understand when I told him.
Until he asked me if I wanted a snack, and then got completely flabbergasted because: "You can't eat anything!"

Only one of my friends (who isn't a vegan themselves) immediately said "Go for it! You can do it!" without even a second of hesitation, or skepticism. (In all reality, she said it in a text message, so for all I know, she could have been rolling her eyes and scrunching her face all over the place, but I took it as sincere support and appreciate Taylor very much for it.)

But the purpose of this post (other than being a passive attempt to tell my mom about my new dietary restrictions...because her reaction will undoubtedly be a dramatic one)  is to show my brother, and the many other people I have come across in the past few short weeks of my vegan journey who say "Vegan?! What do you eat then?" that a vegan diet is a delicious one, with endless possibilities, room for invention, creativity and extremely satisfying meals that isn't all nuts and berries...

So, here are some of the highlights of my recent home-made vegan masterpieces:

This is one of the first fully vegan meals I made for myself, when I first started seriously thinking about going full force. It's a Reuben. The main difference from my would-be previous vegetarian version: vegan mozzarella, and a home-made vegan thousand island dressing. 

I used Tofurky, cooked up in a zesty meaty combination ( I think it was soy sauce, ketchup, and a dash of liquid smoke) grilled onions, red sauerkraut I picked up on a whim a few weeks prior, and a "thousand island" sauce made with soy-mayo, Catalina dressing, pickles and onions.

This meal is where I first patented the idea for a "Fat Girl Life-Alert." (You know the buttons they have for old people who fall and can't get up? Ya, I need one for food comas.)

This was test number two. Vegan mac and cheese (one of my true loves in life).

I wanted to know: is it doable?

Because I surely couldn't live without this tasty combination.

Well let me tell you, this recipe (an adaptation to my original, real cheese recipe, but with almond milk, vegan cheese, nutritional yeast, turmeric and I'm sure a lot of other seasonings... oh, and some broccoli) was I kid you not - better than than my original recipe by far. 

I am not just saying that. 

Drooling right now just thinking about this shiz.

Delish recipe numba three: a vegan taco salad.
Made with my home-made taco meat leftover from a "taco party" dinner the night before. (Ok, it was just me and Sean, not really a party per se, but we did break out the limes and the Modelo Especial.)  

It doesn't need much explaining, other than the fact that I used TVP for the meat, seasoned up crazy good Mexi-style, and let it simmer.

It was bomb. 

I brought the leftover-leftovers to friends' house that night as part of a Mexican bean/"cheese" dip that pleased the whole darn crowd of meat-eaters and vegetarians alike.
Success.

 Full-on "Italian Dinner" complete with a side ceasar salad (I scored an organic vegan ceasar dressing at GROCERY OUTLET for a DOLLAR!) toasted bread with vegan spread (I'm currently still working on a large tub of Smart Balance - also from Grocery Outlet.) And a hearty red sauce, made with blended olives, carrots, celery and onions, crumbled "Italian" baked WestSoy tofu, red wine, diced onions, and bunches-o-herbs n' spices.

Deliciouso! 

And finally, my latest creation (ate it for dinner last night and the night before) which I officially dub:

"The Fat Vegan Girl's Dream: fried chicken, bacon and cheese sammich!"

Ok, so I realize this isn't the most appealing food picture I've ever taken, but I had to share this.
(Full disclosure:  this photo  was actually taken mid-bite... at least I took the courtesy of cropping out my greasy vegan fingertips...)

But this thing was soooooo goood. Life Alert was on-hand for sure.

Brief rundown:

Chicken-fried tofu (I used WestSoy's "Asian" baked tofu this time, which I got for 99 cents AT GROCERY OUTLET at the same time I bought the Italian flavor. I think I'm going to go back and get more soon because they came in handy...)

I adapted my breaded-then-fried tofu recipe from No Face Plate, using flour, a non-egg wash (milk and a dash of olive oil did the trick), Shake-n-Bake, nutritional yeast and onion powder.

Fried it up in olive oil and placed it on toasted bread: one slice slathered with soy-mayo, hot-n-spicy stone ground mustard, onion, pickles and lettuce; the other slice: Tofutti cream cheese, Daiya cheddar cheese shreds and Bacos.

Excuse the language, but EFF YA.

So in conclusion, you can see there are tons of possibilities for us vegans to enjoy "normal,"  fattening, carb-laden, sodium-packed foods, just like the rest of America!

And all without contributing to needless animal suffering.

:)